Ep 23: Jennifer Gerlock Pursues It All
In this episode, I host Jen Gerlock from Pursuit of it All, discussing Jen's recent life transitions. Jen shares her story of leaving a high-pressure job she loved to prioritize her health and personal happiness, and how she now dives deep into new challenges and adventures.
We talk about the courage it takes to break free from societal expectations, especially for women in their 50s, and to really live authentically.
Links from this episode
Follow Christine Van Bloem on Instagram @theemptynestkitchen and on Facebook @emptynestkitchen
Learn more about Menopause Meal Plans
Sign up for my FREE 10 Essential Tools for the Empty Nest Kitchen
Check out Pursuit of It All
Rate, review & subscribe on Apple Podcasts
Want to show this podcast some love? Leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts!
Click here to view our show on Apple Podcasts then click on Listen on Apple Podcasts. This will open your podcast player.
If you want to get my latest episodes, be sure to click Subscribe.
Scroll to the bottom then select your star rating ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.
Then click on Write a Review. I’d love to hear what you enjoyed most about this episode or our podcast in general!
-
Hey, Christine here. I just wanted to let you know, you can still become a founding member. Of menopause meal plans. I got to tell you if ladies that are joining the club. Are so great, so fun. And they're loving the meals. If you want more information, just go to empty nest kitchen. Dot com and you can find it all there. Now let's join the episode.
Christine Van Bloem:0:51
Oh, happy day. I am always so thrilled to have a guest for our four listeners, but today, boy, do I have another ray of sunshine here. I am so pleased to welcome a fellow gal about town say hello to Jen Gerlock from Pursuit of it All. Hey,
Jennifer Gerlock:1:11
Hi, how are you?
Christine Van Bloem:1:13
I'm good. How are you? And I should ask, do you want to go by Jen or
Jennifer Gerlock:1:18
Oh, Jen is for people who know me. Jennifer is, you know, if we haven't gotten past the formality or if I'm in trouble.
Christine Van Bloem:1:26
Yeah. Yes. Christine Marie. All day. And I was never Christine Marie, like I was always Chris. And then there are so many Chris's in the world that they had to start calling me Christine because I worked with all these men named Chris. So I always try to ask, but I think Christine Van Bloem sounds so much more trust
Jennifer Gerlock:1:47
Oh, it is your alter ego.
Christine Van Bloem:1:50
Yeah, well, don't I wish. I am just, I'm gonna quote my grandma, tickled. that you hear today and I wanted to talk to you because we have known each other for a long time and we're not besties, we're acquaintances, but we catch a vibe. We catch a vibe, right, for a long time and I have admired you for just forever and you have this super fun website that you do called Pursuit of it All. Tell, tell everybody how they can pursue it all.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:2:26
gosh. Well, we, you know, that actually started out as a collaboration between me and three other gals, and we just wanted somewhere where we could, we like the girlfriend vibe, right? So, you know, you, your friends and what they recommend and what they're interested in. And we wanted a place to just pursue anything we wanted. Anything. It didn't matter. Like, are you interested in this? I am. Would you like to geek out on that? Absolutely. And it gave us an opportunity to really be a little journalistic and go on adventures together. And you know, over the years they've gone on to different projects, but I just could not let this go. And I'm just really digging into it now. But, you know, it's that thing. You can't let it go. That passion.
Christine Van Bloem:3:10
You can't let go. That's how it was with Empty Nest Kitchen. I've had it for years and I was like, I'm going to get there. I'm going to get there. And sometimes it takes a little something to push you into that. Right?
Jennifer Gerlock:3:24
it's true.
Christine Van Bloem:3:25
Yeah. Cause you're kind of like right now you're a little bit of the side hustle queen because you finally have some time to do this kind of
Jennifer Gerlock:3:34
know. Well, it I've, I've, I've held onto this for a while. I mean, I've been writing many, many years and I've had other, you know, websites or blogs or projects. You know, I've had blogs on media outlets and things like that, but but I just couldn't. Right? In recent years, I was, I had, you know, a lot of demands on me. I just wasn't feeling very creative. I wanted to, again, that's why I wouldn't let it go. Absolutely wouldn't let go. But now I'm finally in a space where like slowly and surely it's just flowing. And it's, I do it for fun. I do have fun opportunities that come out of it, but it's just, it's my outlet and I love it.
Christine Van Bloem:4:14
It is. The writing is, I mean, writing is a thing, right? When you like to do it. It's, it just flows. But if you have to do it and you don't want
Jennifer Gerlock:4:26
No way.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:4:27
it's the worst, is the worst. The writer's block and all the things I can figure out to do with my life that are not writing whatever that specific thing is, 100%. All right. So you had the, the reason that I really wanted to have you on is because my four listeners are Empty Nest ladies, And I know you have two really fantastic boys. I'm just, I kind of have a mom crush on your
Jennifer Gerlock:4:57
Aww.
Christine Van Bloem:4:58
right? They're no, they're the sweetest. They are grown men, grown men, which is crazy, but. I know you're an empty nester and you have recently gone through kind of a big life transition and I have found that the ladies who are listening are a lot of times going through these transitions as well and you had what I would call kind of a big job, right? Yeah, you had
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:5:28
I was collecting them. Yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:5:30
fancy titles and the whole, the whole shebang and You gave up the fancy job, and that was a, that's a, like, that's a bold move, right?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:5:44
I gave myself my own life shake up. It was true. It was really true. I yeah, I had all the titles I'd ever wanted. You know My 25 year old self. on the back right now. Well, actually, no, she would probably be very confused right now because I just did everything that she would never do. But but yeah, so I just came to a point, you know, there was a lot going on in my life, a couple of things happened along the way. Health issues, issues with a parent just a lot of things going on. I started to really suffer through some exhaustion and burnout and I, I, I, you know, I know it's a, it's a word, a lot of people do it and I, and I winced, I winced when my doctor was like, you know what? It's happening here, don't you? And I was like, no cause I didn't want to admit that. And so I just made a major life shift at a period of time where for all intents and purposes, I would say that I was doing super well. I was checking all the boxes. Like the projects that I was working on were incredible and fun and just filled with just the best humans. But I couldn't. Personally, personally, I wasn't making it through. I wasn't thriving the way the Incredible Humans were. So, all these things combined led me to leaving a job that I really loved, with people I really loved, for something completely different and unknown. So, you know yeah, that's where I am now.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:7:16
Yeah. And it's so, it's so funny because whenever you do a change like that, and I was at a job as well at nonprofit agency in the town that we're in. And I loved the people. The people were just so ding dang good. I mean, gracious and the work was super rewarding and all that. But you get those things, the health challenges, the parent challenges, nothing will set you off like a sick mom. Let me tell you that, right? And then people always want the, the gossip. People want the hot gossip, you know, did you see so and so? Oh my And it's so funny. It's just, I, I personally think that once you hit 50, it is Like, the gloves are off and it's just, you have to figure out what's going to make your life the life you want to lead,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:8:14
Yeah, that's so true. You know, I was also non profit. Also loved the people, the committees I was on. Everything that came from that. But, you know, I found my soul. What kicked it all off, honestly, was I got some blood work back. Normal. You know, a routine thing, type of appointment. But I got some blood work back that flagged me for, I, I, a metabolic syndrome, which I know a lot about because my husband had had metabolic syndrome and he had suffered a heart attack very young and triple bypass surgery as a result. And they flagged him as that and they said whenever that is, All of these things could happen. So I got, so I got diagnosed with that. Then my blood work came back and it was a scooch from pre diabetic. I mean, like we're talking this, a scooch and yes. And so, and then the doctor was, you know, in this, she was, you know, giving me the what for and she was very serious and she started saying to me things like, okay. What can you change in your life? We need to go through this because you're suffering from, like, your cortisol levels are crazy. You are very, very stressed. Describe to me a typical week, month. You know, we went through all of these things, and she asked me what I could change, and I had to change it. And so I started really thinking about that, and so I came to the conclusion that at that point that I had to really kind of let go of personal things. Couldn't change my job, couldn't change my family obligations but I had to let go, you know, the personal fun stuff. So like meeting with friends and all the extracurriculars because I had to go and like do a deep dive on my health. So I did that which that translates into like Like, you call your friends every, when you can, but you don't do things, right? So, it's professional obligation only. And then my mom got sick, right? So, I was making some headway, a couple of months, right? I was making some headway, but I was lonely. And I saw people during the day, but I was lonely. Not seeing the people that I wanted to that in the manner that I wanted to. My sister, people like that. You know, and then my mom got sick and that was like a very dramatic multi month event, which has some things after it that, you know, flare back up. And, and we almost lost her straight up, almost lost her a couple of times. She was, you know and it was very dramatic and I had to leave and my work was wonderful about it, but you put the two together. And then a couple of months later, I just started realizing, well, gosh, I did really well, lost some weight, changed some numbers, like really, really good, but I still, to keep it, I couldn't bring friends back. And that's a terrible. Realization.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:10:58
it's taking the fun. It's taking the fun out of the life. Not that the job isn't fun because of course the job, you know, you love the job, right? But now you're sacrificing the fun parts of living. It's like, you're only eating the salad, but you don't get the dressing or the cheese or the croutons. You've only got lettuce.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:11:20
I like cheese, and I like dress.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:11:23
like cheese. I love the food.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:11:25
really had to think about it. I have to say one thing about me is like, most of my life this is probably something I should have explored in therapy, but most of my life, my job has like, sort of defined me. And I know that's the, yeah, I watched Working Girl way too much when I was growing up. Like, oh,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:11:43
That movie, that movie is the reason I moved to New York City. Not a joke. That was entirely I can recite every line. I love it. I think it's still saved on the DVR. I just
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:11:55
Yeah, I have to tell you, and this just as an aside, I still have an article that I clipped out of like Vogue or something like that back then that talked about the beauty difference, like the subtle differences between the working girls and the executive women. And I clipped it and I kept it. I still have it. It's hilarious. But anyway, that's enough of that. Hilarious. But yeah, so I just I just had to really think about it and I had to, I, I, I, where would I, who would I be without the title and, and the thing. That I was doing and the projects I was working on, you know, and I had to be very strategic about it. I mean, I'm a happy go lucky person, but I'm pretty strategic. And so I had to give myself, okay, worst case scenario you lose 80 percent or 90 percent of the people or the things you enjoy. You go into a job that's not as fulfilling, you know, like I did all the things in my head. And so I was really considering that and then as Life happens. Things happen for a reason. A job just kind of fell ish a bit in my lap. Not that I didn't have to interview and do all the things for it, but, but it just kind of came across. My purview at a time where I was thinking about really heavy considerations and I started to get a realize that things were not going to change in my professional life for a significant amount of time. So, you know, I decided to switch careers at the weirdest, most advanced like Most of the time of my life, it didn't make sense.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:13:24
I think, I think it makes perfect sense because you, I think you and I are not coasters, right? We don't, and I'm not saying your job, you would, you could not coast in that job, right? But there is a comfort to being in a position for a long time. And we're not talking about, we're getting pensions. At the end of these jobs, right? We are definitely not talking about that, but the, the burnout comes, right? And you really have to. Dig in and look at it and decide where you're going. And for me, I think it's fun. I think these new challenges, you know, people are kind of like, you're doing what? And it's like, yeah,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:14:14
Yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:14:16
why not? I don't ever want to not challenge myself.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:14:19
true. I mean, I, I just, you get bored is not the right word, but you get completely doing the same thing. Or I, I thrive with new challenges. Like that's where I want to be. And you know, we were talking a little bit earlier and, and and, and I mentioned that I was, I really was trying to be disappointed in myself for this. You know, I was really trying to like bring all those emotions up. Like, you're disappointing the community, you're disappointing this person. And I, and I really felt like this is just such a cop out or something. But you know, I've decided that it's actually the bravest thing I've ever done. In my life.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:14:54
It, it is, it is the previous thing, and I will tell you this, the easy thing is to stay in the position, even if it's a hard driving position, where you have a ton of responsibility, but not only grasping the unknown, but, you know, ripping off your goggles, You know, throwing your bathing suit to the side and diving in, you know, all cannonball. That, that is so brave. I just, I, it's something I really admire. I don't know if you had a listen to the episode I did a couple of weeks back with Elizabeth
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:15:32
Mm hmm.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:15:34
And she, you know, next time I'm going to get her to really dig in on there. But she kind of quit her big job and Took a year to kind of give herself a sabbatical and the fact that you've gone into another job now, I, I think that's awesome. I think that's
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:15:51
Would you want to hear some unintended consequences of that? Yes. Okay. So since doing that and my gut, you know, feels good, like there's no bad feeling, like I know I made the right decision for me for now. I have done things that I wouldn't have done before. We're talking like, like adventure type situations, like hiking and, and, and climbing and taking rides up mountains that Like I've, I'm doing different things than I did before, so it's. Yeah, it's had some unintended consequences.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:16:27
That's So do you feel, do you feel more. open and more free and maybe more like who you really are at this phase in your life.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:16:42
I do. And I don't know if that was a me thing, if I was just trying to fit myself into a mold that I thought I had to be in, because I, I can't tell you that anybody was like, ma'am, you need to be more at your end or less, maybe less is usually what they tell you, but I feel like I, I'm, I don't need to be less. And I actually came into the new position and into this new writing life As whatever I want to be, like piercings, tattoos, whatever, like nothing's off the table. Whereas I would tell you that a year ago, absolutely not. Absolutely
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:17:18
I, I, yeah, I totally hear this. When, when I took This job for the nonprofit. I didn't realize, like, I'm a big personality. You're a big personality. We're both, you know, and I didn't realize how much I was tamping it down because I really respected the crew that was there. Right. So I didn't want to come in as me and it wasn't an intentional thing. And it wasn't until, you know, I'd been out of the place for six, seven months and I ran into someone and she went, Oh my gosh, you're fine. And I was like, and she was like, I had no idea you were this much fun. And I was like, I, I never was because they were so deeply entrenched there and they knew the business so well. I didn't want to.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:08
Right.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:08
You know, be
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:11
You wanted, you were less.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:13
I wanted to fit in to what they needed. And you feel the
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:19
Oh yeah. I felt the same way. You know, when I was running the leadership program there, which by the way, who gave me that? Yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:29
Best class ever, just so you know, thousand years ago. But yeah, it's a, and for you guys who are not in this area and have no idea who we are, it's a program that's run through the county. And
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:41
What's right? Yeah, so
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:43
it's just so
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:18:43
it is. It's actually run through the Chamber of Commerce, the County Chamber of Commerce. It is Leadership Frederick County, which is the county that we're in. There's leadership programs all over the United States and they're run by different, sometimes they're on their own. Sometimes they're in conjunction with a you know, with with the chamber. And then you lead this cohort of people Ours was specifically 50 and under ish, and you lead this cohort of people through just this incredible experiential journey. And that is what I, I loved it. I loved my experience and I loved being the one who had the fancy title, the executive director title. But I will tell you,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:19
who doesn't love a fancy
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:20
I'm just saying.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:21
Right? I'm a sucker! I'm a sucker! I
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:25
know, me
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:25
Like, we're gonna pay you less, but we're gonna call you this,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:28
Absolutely. Can you put, can you embroider it on my shirt? But but you know what? I did. You know, it's interesting now that I'm talking to you. I'm just thinking about this is I had more nightmares during my time running that program. It was the most fun, but my nightmares were the worst. revolved around saying the wrong thing or doing the wrong thing. Isn't that funny?
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:50
be really delicate.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:19:51
Yes, and I still to this day, well not anymore, it doesn't, it doesn't make me wince anymore, but do you ever have like those times when you're like, oh, you sort of secondhand, you're embarrassed for yourself? And nobody remembers it, but you do. And so that was huge because again, I was trying to be appropriate and, and lead it in the way that you know, the expectations were. Now, I don't, I don't have that. And I'm just sort of started this new phase of my life differently. I, I just, I'm coming into it really differently and I am who I am. This is me. This is my personality. And, and yeah, it's just very, it's very different. It's really freeing. And I hear a lot of people talk about that. Like, I don't, I don't care. Elizabeth Cromwell, as a matter of fact, she did say that in your podcast. She said that it's just a very different level of caring. She said it much more eloquent.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:20:42
Yeah.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:20:43
The thing she cares about now, the, you know, the expectations now are very different than maybe when we were in our 20s and 30s.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:20:50
Oh my gosh, I hope so. Like, who was she? Who was she back then? Oh my gosh, I can't even imagine. You know, I'm so glad I don't really know her anymore because I don't think we'd get along really well.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:21:04
Have you ever thought of, one time this is, you know, one of the things I actually read, someone wrote, have you ever thought, like, if you could go back and tell, like, 20 year old you some things, like, what advice would you give 20, or 25, whatever that might be what advice would you give yourself? Like, I think about that a lot.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:21:24
I just did this. I just did this because I had seen it a couple of months ago as a trend, you know, a trend online where 20 somethings were asking 50 plus a question, you know, and it was about things he just wanted to know is so wholesome and it was, it wasn't jerky and, and all of that. was so wholesome and so uplifting that I sent an email out and I asked people to send me things and I shared them on social media and the overwhelming thing, I mean, there was always the do not date that guy. You think you want to date that guy, don't date that guy, right? There's always that, but a lot of it was You don't have to be so uptight about everything. You can relax about things. You need to be kind to yourself. And these were the things that the 50 plus ladies were telling the other people and, and take care of your body. That was a really good one. Cause it's so much
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:22:29
yeah, that's true. You know it took me, now that I'm just thinking about this as we're talking, I wanted to get my nose pierced. When I was in my 30s, maybe 20, nah, 30s, 30s. Anyway, I met someone. I thought she was super cool. She was, I loved her whole vibe. She was very effortless. She was very carefree. She was very herself. I was drawn to that, but I didn't let myself, you know, like I'm drawn to people who are very much themselves, but I would like tamper my own my personality down and I wanted it and it took me 15 years or something ludicrous, maybe 10 to do it. And I've had my nose pierced for some time now. And people even say to me sometimes, Oh, I never even noticed. I was afraid that I would lose business or that I wouldn't be highly regarded. I don't know, insert whatever here. I was really afraid of that. And yeah, so I would kind of go back and give, Young Jen, a little bit more than that, but I would definitely tell her to just people are not as concerned as you think.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:23:30
Yeah. Yeah, I just went in May and got my cartilage pierced and a second hole in each ear. And I was like, Oh, I feel so incredible. Look at me. Nobody knows this.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:23:43
Yeah, so funny story. What is it about us? Because I got three piercings in one year. So you can't see them because I happen to have usually my hair is covered down, but a lot of times I'll flip my, my hair back behind my ear. So I have more piercings than tattoos, which is so funny to say, but where am
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:01
that so
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:02
I just got them done.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:04
Oh, you
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:05
I did like last year. Yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:07
Oh my gosh. It hurts so much. The cartilage hurts so much. It hurts so much. It's
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:15
I went by myself. I was like, you know, I was going to go with someone. I went by myself. I walked in this very tattooed, very pierced man, much younger than me. And it was just middle of the day. I took a day off randomly because I had some PTO to burn. And I walked in there, and I had gotten My tattoo there, and I got my nose pierced there like years, years, years before. And he said to me, he gave me a certain type of earring because he said, you can reuse them for your next piercing. And I was looking at him like, I was like, what else do you think I'm going to get pierced, buddy?
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:48
What are we
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:49
I know, but I guess he must have seen something in me, like, She'll be back.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:53
Yeah,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:54
She's going through it. Give her the earrings that she can use anywhere else.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:24:58
so funny. That's so funny. No, I am like, I would love to do something. No, no, it hurt. It hurt. And I'm, I'm like kind of gearing up for a tattoo right now because I don't have any. You have a couple,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:25:11
I only have one, and do you know which one I chose? It's on my wrist, and it's actually facing the wrong way, according to the tattoo guy. He was a little confused, but it's facing so I can read it. And all it says is, you can. I know,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:25:26
stop. Stop, you little motivational guru,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:25:29
I did it, I, but you want, you want to hear something funny? You know, when I did that, I did that when I was going through it, when I was prior to like the realization and the doctor saying, listen, this is classic burnout and exhaustion and la, la, la, la, la I was feeling it. And but I didn't know what it was. I was just like, I, I can do hard things. Like what is going on with me? I can do hard things. I went through COVID, blah, blah, blah, all these things. So I, I just felt like I liked that message. And where, and you know, so I oriented it. So it's facing me. But yeah, that's,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:04
Are you, are you a mantra girlie?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:07
well, I don't know. What do you mean by mantra?
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:10
Well, like, you know, so I am super skeptical about, oh, I don't know, everything, right? I'm a real hard case. I'm very, well, I'm a Virgo, right? So it, it, it totally makes sense. But, you know, I know people that are like, Oh, I say the mantras. And I say, you know, in a remembering the
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:33
Yeah,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:34
Where she
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:35
you kind, you spread, yeah, yeah, you is important, you spread, yeah, something like that.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:42
Something like that. And you know, that just gave me goosebumps right there. But the, the meditations and the mantras and
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:52
You is, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:26:55
a toe. I'm dipping a toe. I'm like, what does it hurt? Nobody's around, right? Nobody's around. And I'm like, I'm manifesting. I'm manifesting, you know,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:27:06
to it, I've just never been like a woo woo kind of person, but you're
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:27:10
and neither have
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:27:11
right, I am, I am a little bit more than I have been in the past. So, I would say that, yeah, a little bit more than in the past, but, but not to the point where I'm like, that's so cliche, or like, if I start to like, roll my eyes at myself, then I stop. Ah,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:27:29
I like, so I have a, I have a Peloton, and I know you can tell by looking at me, but I love the darn Peloton, and they have all sorts of workouts, and one of the things they do have are meditations, and I think that people use the meditations when they want to keep their streak going, so it counts as something. But it's totally cheating the system. I don't do that. I would never but they have like sleep meditations and they put it, I call it the tinkle music, you know, it's like, and they're talking to you like this and their voices sound like butter and honey and all this thing. And I'm like, you know, out like a light of like sleep meditations from a thing. I love a sleep meditation.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:28:17
I can get on board with. But I do, I usually feel very uncomfortable when I'm in, like, if I'm trying yoga, because I don't really, I just, I'll do it, and then I'll, Won't do it forever, and then I'm back to trying it again, and then I don't know anything about it. And then they're saying things like, breathe in, center, and find your, reach out, or whatever they're saying that seems a little, like I get uncomfortable with that. I flow with it, but I, I'm like, oh, what are we talking about here? So yeah,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:28:43
Yeah!
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:28:43
I'm very Generation X, right? I'm, So, very you know, sarcastic, very, like, I got that dark humor situation going on. I love a good murder, serial killer podcast. Me
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:28:58
I'm listening, I, right now, I'm behind the times. I'm listening to Scamanda, like Scamanda. And, cause I know they're doing a series or something with it. So, I was like, I'm just gonna listen to the podcast, cause I, Love a good podcast, but my husband and I have listened to some murder things when we're driving back and forth to the city And we're like, okay, I need a break. I need I need some, you know flowers I need to listen to some poppy music. No more no more murder. So it's so funny Do you have like a favorite podcast that you
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:29:33
Oh, I listen to, I listen to many, but mostly, like, so I do listen, happen to listen to a whole bunch of, like, self help ish type ones, but yeah. But then I need a, not unlike you, except the opposite, then I need a break and I go to, like, stuff that's more, like, you know, pop culture or seroculture.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:29:55
okay, sometimes don't you listen to, and I love business podcasts like Girl Businesses I love them, I totally love them, but sometimes aren't you like, well, I totally suck, so you go into something else, right?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:30:10
Sometimes I'm like that's a bit much, so we're not there. Like, let's just take a nap, man.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:30:19
is Gen X. That is Gen X right there. Just take a nap. You'll be
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:30:23
Oh my god, yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:30:24
You'll be fine. So, you've made these big changes, right? And, you're really embracing it. And, I've met your husband several times. He is very supportive. Much like your sons, you know, terrible person, hate him. No, just super like I think we both kind of hit the jackpot with men who love and really support us as we go through our stuff, right? So you are really feet first now and have the time to pursue, haha, no
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:31:00
right. See what you did
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:31:01
But Pursue these other interests. And I love it. This is where I'm going to put you on the spot a little, and I can, if you guys can see your face, it just got really concerned. But let's say that someone is listening. Right? And they're in their 50s, and their kids are, maybe they're still living at home, but they're adult, they're handling their stuff, and they feel, I mean, we know the burnout thing. What, what's a piece of advice? What's something that you would tell someone who is stuck? And maybe they, you know, I think at our age, it's too long to say just work to retirement. Right, that's a long time. That's a long time. So what do you say to someone who's like, I feel really stuck?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:31:54
You know yeah. But it's a little trite, but like I finally came to my own, the conclusion that I'm, I'm responsible for my own happiness. And you know, we have wonderful spouses, we have wonderful children, but you're born alone, you die alone. And you are honestly responsible for you. They're not in your head. They mean well, they don't know truly what makes you happy or what makes you happy. Like gives you a spark, gives you a little fairy dust, you know, that reminds me of my mom. They don't know that. And so you, you gotta stop. Relying on other people, if you are, to make you happy and you're responsible for your own existence, we're all, as women who have children or, you know, or even not, you know, we're, we're used to giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, giving, and that was part of my hesitation to make any changes in my life. I felt like I was letting a thousand people down, complete strangers, complete strangers people that maybe I wouldn't see again, who I'd Loved and I won. They were in my life for a season But but like they're there you're responsible for you No one's coming to like save you from that and to just like stop worrying so much about what other people think Maybe people don't have that concern as much as I did, but I did I will tell you people pleaser 100 percent always got in my head what other people are saying and they're not saying it like I'm making it up.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:33:27
Yeah.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:33:28
so I just feel like I, I don't, I don't even know if that really answered your question, but I, I just got to a point where I started when I had a really heart to heart talk with myself, like what really will make me happy? And it's not stupid and it's not, you know, when is, when is it time for you? Because we're not getting any younger. Like, when is it when you really think about it? When is it time for you to do anything to, to get the pumpkin spice latte? That's 5 as opposed to, you know, saving your money to give the kid the notebook they want or whatever that is. I'm, I'm, I don't know. I it's just, that's the stage I'm in. Does that answer your question at all?
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:34:12
Oh my gosh a hundred percent because I think you're right. You know, I think that Gen X women are built on, sure we're tough and we're sarcastic and all of that, but we walk that line between our moms who couldn't have a credit card, right, who couldn't rent an apartment on their own, and, you know, our kids who are, I have a 25 year old daughter who is gonna, Slay the world, I think, you know, who's just out there and going. And we're firmly in the middle of that. I think we're really still built on service. It's one of the reasons I love this. Gen Z generation. I'm mildly obsessed with them because I think they're our only hope, you know, because they're not gonna take it. Take it and we took it, right? I'm sure you had some creepy guy in an office, you know, being creepy and maybe he didn't do anything, but he was just creepy, right? We all had to deal with that, getting cornered in the
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:35:15
Oh yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:35:16
whatever, you know, it just. was a factor of dealing with it. These young ladies will cut you. And I
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:35:25
It's
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:35:25
love it. It's gonna be verbally, but you would wish it was with an actual knife. Because I just, I admire them. And you know, I try to have instilled that in my own daughter and my own kids. But yeah, I think you're totally right. I think that, you know, like I love my family. I love doing stuff for my family. It gives me, it gives me total joy to help out and run the car to get the emissions tested because I've got the time. Like I can do that or, you know, make this special dinner or something. And I think you're I think it's kind of like, if not now,
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:36:04
It's exactly, if not now, Duane. And, and we always think we have more time. We always think we have more time. And, and it's sad that we have, it takes like someone's passing or, or a tragedy To shake us a little bit from that. I'm, I'm just lucky that my mom recovered in the way that she recovered and, and whatnot. That was my little wake up call, but we always think we have more time. And you know, you know, there's what, there was a news story recently, and I'm going to butcher it, but there's a news story about a woman who passed away at her desk, did you hear this? She passed away at her desk and they didn't even know she was gone for like four days, something like that. Man, yes, and it's because you know, there were like situations and things like that, but she would you know, she never you know What if she never did anything because she was waiting for that retirement and she was just busting her hump at her at her job I think that's why I like this new generation I went through a period of time where I was like sort of scoffing at them like they just don't want to work You know the whole thing like I was I was I wasn't that far, but I was like looking at them a little bit like, what's going on over there? But now I've had some great co workers who have really taught me boundaries. Boundaries are good.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:37:19
Boundaries. And listen, they're not perfect. Bless their hearts. They're not perfect. But, but I do. I really appreciate their boundaries. I really appreciate where they are, what they're doing, and how they stand up for themselves. I just think it's fantastic.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:37:37
I think it's the Gen Z of it all and reading things online where they're like, I don't need to have to kill myself for that. You know, that those type of conversations going around that actually gave me the, the mindset of, I don't need that. You know, I can give that up because I, I, I don't need that. I don't need to kill myself. I don't need to, you know, I'll still do excellent work. I'll still push myself. But I, I really do think I was influenced by my younger, like coworkers and colleagues and, you know, discussions online that actually gave me a little bit of that courage to be in the same mindset and kind of give myself, give back to me. Yeah,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:38:19
Back to Me. I think that's the title of the episode now. I, well, you know, Jen Gerlock gives back to me. So, I love it. I love it. All right, what's something, what's something you're really looking forward to?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:38:32
Well, so gosh, I have some, well, trips, of course, you know, anybody, if they say we want to, we're going to have some trips and things like that, but really looking forward to just, I'm really looking forward to, I hate to say this, I have one friend who's going to call me on it. She likes to joke and add to my bucket list all the time, stuff that I would never do, and she puts them, puts them on my bucket list. I try to tell her, that's not how it works. You don't get to put. Things on other people's bucket list, which she does, but I'm, I'm, I'm looking forward to doing, Stretching my wings more and doing things more outside of my comfort zone, whether that's writing for the website. I have some ideas about like really making myself uncomfortable to do things that I would never do and then writing about that just for the sake of like encouraging other people, but I think it's just I'm looking forward to doing things that I either was too scared to do or couldn't because of my life constraints at the time and, and, and, you know, anytime someone says, someone might say, Jen Gerlock did that? Like, I'm looking forward to that.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:33
Yeah, that's it. Keep them guessing.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:35
I don't know what that means, but yeah,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:40
It's kind of like, it's finally time to live for yourself.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:44
for my real self.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:45
yeah. For your real self. Isn't that fun?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:48
it really is.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:49
How lucky are we?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:51
I know, it's good.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:39:53
Okay, so the whole idea of the Empty Nest Kitchen podcast, it's supposed to be like we're sitting around my kitchen table, and we kind of are because I'm at my dining room table right now but I always like to bring a little food into it. So cheese, I like ratatouille all the way, baby. Give me all the cheese. What are, what are you eating cheese
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:40:22
Okay, you are going to laugh at this. It's a very interesting tie in because Miss Christine Van Bloem came to my house and we had her we did a cooking class here at my house with my lovely sons and my husband, and we Have not stopped talking about it. Do you know that I bought all of the all of the ingredients for French onion soup two days ago and we're making it tomorrow and that has an excessive amount of cheese made by me.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:40:51
It does! Gruyere cheese. We love
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:40:54
true.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:40:55
So good. I have to say, the thing I took away from that, a lot of times you go and you do a class, right? I've gone and done classes in people's homes for a long time. And most of the time, they're really awesome and they're super fun. But I have to say, I was so blown away. I don't know if I told you this or not, I think maybe I did. But with how loving your son, I mean your husband of course, but your sons were, because you're a boy
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:41:22
am. All the way.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:41:24
And, It was, I didn't feel like I wanted to rush out of there. I didn't feel like my feet hurt. It's time to go home. It was such a warm and loving environment and it was just, it was really sweet like as the person who got to walk into that situation. That was really fun
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:41:44
They talk about it to this day, and we bought all sorts of, you know, pots and things, and, and we've made, you know, the breads and stuff, and now they want to do more ever since then, and they just loved it. You, it gave them permission, like, you have a way of teaching you gave them a lot of permission. And that was really important. Just play with it. Just, it's not, you know, it's not about you're not doing it wrong. It's like, it's not, you didn't touch it 90 degrees to the right and now it's all ruined. You know, they took a lot out of it. It was really fun. It was a really fun fit. Like it was about, it was fun for not just a cooking lesson for like a life lesson. Right.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:42:25
yeah. Yeah.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:42:26
Don't be scared of it or just play if if it, if it goes wrong, it's fine. We'll, we'll re you know, we can re recalibrate. We can, you know, we'll, we'll throw it away. What You even said that at one point we'll throw it away and eat something else. That's fine.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:42:39
Yeah. I, you know, my thing is it's a meal, not a mortgage. Right. And I just picked up, I'm teaching a baking class at the local community college and it came about, it was like two weeks from, would you be interested to doing this to kids sitting in my classroom? And because of that, I have a little tiny class. And today we made chocolate eclairs and let me tell you, I can knock the bananas out with chocolate eclair. I could make it. half asleep if I had to. They're so good. And like being able to really walk them through and having the luxury of this little tiny class of, if they heard that I called them cutie patooties because they're all young adults, right? But to me, everybody under 30 is just a baby. So it's, it's so much fun to try to bring that knowledgeable but relaxed vibe because I just don't think it's worth getting twitchy
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:43:36
I, I love it. I mean, it reminds me, you know, it reminded me of I've been doing some work lately. I wanna start blogging about. Food. I have never been a cook. Like, we joke my husband cooks really lovely, wonderfully plated meals. I just keep people alive. But now, that's it. That's like my whole theme of my life. But we have started, I've started doing things that if I'm mildly curious about it, this goes along with the, the courage type of thing that I was telling you about being a little bit more brave. If I'm mildly curious about it, I'm just going to try to do it. And so I, I made Madeline's. Why? I bought fancy pans. I made, I saw on TikTok some little Aperol Spritz and I was like, what are these things? So instead of going and ordering one, I bought everything and I started making, I had invited friends over and started making them. So like, that's the type of thing that I mean, like things that cooking is a big thing for me because I don't know, I'm not,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:44:32
Yeah, if you ever get, if you ever get hung up, just reach out. I have people that, I have people that will still reach out to me from 10 years ago and say, we once made this thing. And I'm like, yep, got it. Here's the recipe. Let me know if you need help. You know, but I love that you're doing that. It's a certain amount of letting go to be able
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:44:54
Well, it's just, it's all about challenging yourself, like, and, and just taking on, you know, like I'm, I've never done this thing before. It makes me a little nervous. So I know nothing about this and I'm, you know, 50 years old. How do I know nothing about this? And so it's like, well, I guess it's about time to learn about it. Like, so yeah. All of
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:45:12
I've got a new one for you. All from Chutes. I've got a new one for you. Have you ever tried a Hugo Spritz?
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:45:18
No, but I feel like I've heard it. No.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:45:22
Yeah, I think it's got, I'm pretty sure it's got elderflower in it. And I, I don't know why. I don't like anything floral. Boy, do I love elderflower liqueur. A Hugo Spritz is elderflower, baby. And it is, I'm, now it's summery, right? Like right now, I like, things that have a bit more, I would say, a beast note, right? Like some depth to it, some umami to it. But this is just the St. Germain and mint, and you smoosh it together, add some ice, Prosecco, and soda water, and that's
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:45:56
Oh my gosh.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:45:57
You know, but it's, I mean, hello delicious.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:00
try that. Yeah, I'm just, I just try everything else.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:03
there you
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:04
my whole life. That's my whole mantra now. Sure.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:07
I love that. All right, so if somebody wants to find you, where are they going to find
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:12
So they can find me at Pursuitofitall. com. There is and if you go there, there's, I mean, I'm very findable. You just Google me. I like, unfortunately I'm an open book, just so way too much, but Pursuitofitall. com. And then we have Instagram not. Rocking the TikTok yet, but I'm trying. I certainly stalk the TikTok, but yeah, I stalk it like
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:33
I, no, it's, it's ridiculous. It's ridiculous for me. I'm like, who are you? Just
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:40
I know. I'm the worst, I'm the worst. But yeah, so you can find me there and, and you know, I'm sure, like I said, I'm going to be trying a whole bunch of new things just for the sake of the art with quotes, air quotes, you know, that journalistic, like just intent. I just would like to figure it out.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:46:57
Maybe if anybody had suggestions for after they read, after they read some of your stuff, right, to catch your vibe, which is delightful maybe they can give you a suggestion. But I'm going to put, I'm going to put all of Jen's information in the show notes that, so that you guys will be able to just do a little clicking. Click and you'll be right there and be able to read. You are a wonderful writer. So being able to write some of your stuff and, and all of that. So, I think you're amazing. Thank you for taking the time. And you said this was your first
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:31
It, it is. I'm so nervous we're talking to you. Yes. Us
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:37
No. No.
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:39
talking over coffee somewhere is very different than me putting on a pair of headphones and trying to not sound ridiculous. So,
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:47
You feel so
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:48
I do actually.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:49
You do feel a little snazzy, right? Make sure you take a, take a selfie of yourself looking
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:47:53
Oh, I think I'm going to, I can't wait to text my parents and be like, I just recorded a podcast. I could still do that and make hair.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:48:02
Well, I gotta tell you, when you decide you're ready to do your own, let me know and I can help you along with it. It is just so much darn fun. It really is. And it was part of, like you said, kind of the I'm just gonna do
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:48:15
Yeah.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:48:16
Right. That's how like the menopause meal plans. I'm just going to do it. Right. It's like, well, I'm just going to do it. Why not? So I love that that's where
jennifer-gerlock--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:48:25
Oh my gosh. That's so fun. Thank you for the opportunity, Chris. That's great.
cvb--she-her-_2_09-25-2024_160557:48:31
Oh my gosh. I appreciate you so much. So everyone, the lovely and talented Jen Gerlock and take a listen, check out the show notes and as always, I'll see you in the kitchen.
